Tuesday, July 28, 2015

Lazy summer days

Things are good.  Luther's felt better.  No hospital visits, so that's a plus!!

I'm feeling pretty blessed.  Top of the rollercoaster, I guess.  You know what would be great?  A flat rollercoaster.  I suppose that's called a train?

Plateaus are good.  Great!  We talk a lot ("we" meaning us folks in the ALS world) about plateaus.  I think I've mentioned this in other posts.

Something rotten will happen.  We are shocked, sad, depressed.  Then we get used to the change and everything's ok for a time.  Then another change occurs and it's another adjustment.

You know the five steps of grief?
1.  Denial
2.  Anger
3.  Bargaining
4.  Depression
5.  Acceptance

It's like we live this over and over and over.  It's the weirdest way to live.  We never get a chance to just breath.  Ok, that's dramatic.  We do just live our lives day to day.  We aren't moping around ALL the time.  It's more like there's this weight in your heart or a little gray cloud that just hangs around you.

Anyways - I didn't mean to get in to another philosophical paragraph about living your best life and all that.  Instead, I just wanted to report that - after a month of some really sh*tty stuff - it's been a good couple of weeks.  Well - maybe a good week and a half!!

My heart busts sometimes with how much I love Luther.  I never ever thought I'd love someone so much.  It's so funny, too... when we first met I just wasn't so sure.  Now, I feel really lucky to have him in my life.

I was thinking about documenting more of our life together.  More pictures.  More blog posts.  I bought a scrapbook in which to put our memories.  I can't remember what I did three days ago -- you know how that goes??  You look back and think - where did the time go?  I mean for heaven's sake, it's going to be August!  Where'd the summer go?!

I don't want to forget.  In a year from now, five, ten years... I want to remember everything.

Just Breathe - Pearl Jam:


Yes, I understand that every life must end
As we sit alone, I know someday we must go
I'm a lucky man, to count on both hands the ones I love
Some folks just have one, others, they've got none

Stay with me / Let's just breathe

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